The most important part of my childhood was being close to my extended family. I had invaluable relationships with my maternal and paternal grandparents, my mother's brother, her two sisters, their husbands, and all of their children. We regularly made trips to visit my father's two sisters and I had amazing times with my cousins. I know all about my family's heritage, traditions, personalities, religious customs, milestones, worries, and celebrations. I felt comfortable knowing my relatives well enough to detect when they needed help, prayer, or companionship.

You won't know any of these people. This is the most difficult part of preparing for you. I won't have aunts and uncles visiting to hug you and welcome you. The grandmother who gave me the most unconditional love that could possibly exist won't watch you grow up and teach you to garden, knit, bake, or build forts with blankets and furniture. You won't have a large group of role models who are kind, wholesome, and well mannered without exception.

I'm trying to find out about your father's side of things, but everything's so limited and no one knows each other. Last night I was ridiculed (again) for wanting to take you to see your great grandparents.

Should I give up? I often feel like you and I will be all alone.